Author: sonsot

The second place is a painful illness that I experience as a series of awakenings I call “life”. I will continue to awaken until I accept, understand, treat, and then overcome my condition, at which point my awakenings will stop. I experience the second place as a permanent, but fluctuating state of desire. I constantly… Continue reading My illness

Forms and performances are the fundamental building block of the second place. They are any separate or unique thing, whether conceptual or perceptual, abstract or concrete. They are the ‘things’ that make up my reality. Forms exist in my inner and outer environments. Trees, cars, milk, my body, my mother’s physical person, and the house… Continue reading Unfinished notes: Understanding forms

September 5, 2021 I know that there are two places: the first place I awaken from, and the second place I awaken into. I know that I search for something, and I know it is not here in the second place. I know that what I search for is the first place. I know that… Continue reading What I know

The second place is a state of illness. Before I realize that, I proceed through various states of self-awareness. I am unaware that I am in a place I do not want to be. I know that I seek something, and flail about looking for it. I try many different things to feed the yearning,… Continue reading Diagnosing the illness

The wider shared reality of people would have me believe that there is an endless world beyond my direct experience happening right now, in this moment. That there are seven billion other human beings having experiences right now. And in addition to those humans, there are trillions of other sentient beings from insects to animals… Continue reading My omniscience

Update 5.2.2022 – With the realization that I am playing, it no longer makes sense to “discourse with ascentists”. Rather than create performances with the puppets, I need to focus on remembering that I am playing, but it is time to let go and move on. Put down the toys, and grow up; be who I… Continue reading Discourse with ascentists

A hypothetical, ongoing interview by an ascentist.

I was always attracted to the various ideologies of salvation and ascension because they spoke about something I knew was real. They spoke about God, enlightenment, heaven, nirvana. I wanted that because I knew that there was  something beyond the familiar. But they all failed to provide a viable, practical path. The object of their… Continue reading The need for a path

There are two places: the peaceful first place I awaken from; and the painful second place I awaken into. I can experience both at any moment, but I have forgotten the true nature of the first place because I am lost in the second place. My only purpose is to escape the second place and… Continue reading The two places

The key to alleviating existential pain is to reduce my distances (read: The distances). Distances are imagined differences between conceptual and perceptual forms I desire. Every distance separates at least two points that can exist perceptually or conceptually. For example, I believe I am a certain weight now; I desire to be a different weight.… Continue reading Pain relief