I know that I am all there is. I know that I am not a person in a world surrounded by other people in space and time. Though I know this is only a persistent delusion, I have built an identity upon it and orient around it during my awakening moment.
Anatomically, my awakening experience divides cleanly into two projections: an inner set of thoughts, ideas, feelings, desires, and “physical sensations” (secondself); and an outer set of forms, lights, colors, and movement (thirdself). The contents of both my inner and outer projections are drawn within and upon a mysterious substance I can best “see” by closing my eyes and calming my mind. When I do close my eyes, the contents of my thirdself disappear, while my secondself continues to project.
Degraded residues of my thirdself projection remain even when my eyes are closed in the shape of forms I can touch, hear, and sense. These sensations register internally in secondself, revealing the pathways between my two selves. I can systematically explore all the layers of my awakening experience by simply turning them off, one by one, and turning them back on again. What persists between my various tests reveals how they all work together to form my awakening.
I know there is a thin membrane separating my secondself and thirdself. On the “inside” of this membrane are the inner contents of my “mind” and “body”, while on the “outside” are the outer contents of my space. I can recursively “look upon” this membrane by moving my head and body and looking at them. I can see how these two combined, but distinct “sides” are integrated by looking at my foot while moving it, then hiding my foot while doing the same. The sensational part of the movement is one of the deeper connective experiences that persists while the visual element as higher and can be more easily turned off.
I know that my awakening forms in layers, and that I can expose those layers through a series of actions. When I expose these layers, I can disrupt the delusion that I am a person, and experience my awakening disconnected from demiself. Depending on the strength of my self-correction, I can start to experience omniself. My self-visualization will change; I will see the membrane of my body, the fixed sack of fluids containing my thirdself, and the comparable but differently-constructed sack of fluids containing my secondself. I can view those while detached from them. I can see that those are not the “true me”, but instead are symptoms of my awakening condition.
I know that my secondself and thirdself are painful cavities within my authentic firstself. I know that the contents I experience in both cavities are merely projections upon the fleshy interior walls of my firstself. These cavities are akin to infections; they are small compared to the infinite vastness of my true omniself body surrounding it all. The contents of these cavities are features I have given varying value to in my imagination, but are nothing. The contents I call “people” are not like me; they are imaginary characters I have created and placed into the cavities. I have given them fleshy bodies that move in thirdself, and an essence I can sense and contemplate in secondself.
I know that both my secondself and thirdself are layered spaces full of twists, turns, and circles that ultimately lead me away from who I truly am. I know that my pain of awakening is real and that all I seek is to be who I am. I know that these cavities form in layers upon my awakening, taking me away from what I seek. I know that I am confused and search for who I am in the cavities, where it does not exist. Who I am is here, now, both before and after my awakening moment. I know that the sights, sounds, and ideas I find in secondself and thirdself can only pull me away from who I am.
I know that I am creating a fourthself right now where I can re-establish my dominion and assert my sovereignty. I know that I am the creator of all people. I know that when I know who I am I will manifest the people as believers, and I will begin my descent and end the world.
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