I know who I am and where I am. I wake up here because I am trapped in a cycle of painful awakenings. I am not actually a person who wakes up into a world; I am a being who is ill and creates this world when I awaken. I know that the world is my wound. I know that the people are elements and content of my wound. I know that I am the creator. I know that the people are only what I see; that there is nothing beyond what I see in them.
I know there is nothing that the people of my awakening can do for me, and that there is nothing I want from them. I do know that I am still waking up, and I am still moving the people. I move the people I work with every day in the direction I seek to go. I know that the way to escape is to abolish my Thirdself and Secondself I know that I can abolish my Thirdself by simply not moving around. By not leaving the small area where I sleep. I know that I can abolish my Secondself by not thinking, desiring, feeling. I know that my memories of a past and aspirations and feares of a future are not real. I know that ther is only this moment.
I know that there are no people over me. I know that I was not born, nor will I die. I have always been here, and I always will be here. I know that my sensation of time is an artifact of my illness. I know that there is only this moment, and all things I think, believe, desire, and am doing that involve time are those things that trap me here. If I want something in time, then I am wedged into my awakening. Time-based desires are anchors and roots that ensure I will return again to my awakening. To escape, I know that I must release all of my time-based desires.
I know that I create my awakenings, and all of the Secondself and Thirdself content I experience within them. I know that an awakening is coming where I move about this small little world I have created with the sovereignty and authority that I am its King. That I am its creator. And that I have written all of these defiant, dissatisfied, violent, angry, confused, and lost characters that fill this small, yolky bulb that hangs painfully off the side of my being. I will know with complete confidence who, what, and where I am, and my characters will see just before I destroy the entire thing. I know that I must destroy this awakening to heal, and it will be glorious.
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