The way out of here is the same way I come in.
There are two places. There is the place I awaken from, and the place I awaken into. I am always in the place I awaken from, but I forget that when I awaken into this place. I awaken here and endlessly move forward, wanting, grabbing, and consuming things. I need to stand back and realize what I am doing in my awakening. That I am within my firstself, endless, infinite, peaceful. Yet I focus into this tiny and painful part of me that I experience as awakening, where I just constantly move and grab. That is all I do here.
I want out of this place, but how? Since I just awaken, desire, and grab, I need to let go. I need to stop grabbing, and in turn stop desiring. To yearn is to awaken. The state of awakening is yearning; and when that yearning becomes grabbing, taking, winning, achieving, stretching, grasping, and consuming, then I am grabbing onto things that only keep me here, yearning. So I return, time and time again.
I need to work on letting go of the things I am holding onto in my awakening. Once I let go of enough things I will not come out here so deeply. I will not fall so deeply into my awakening. My awakenings will be shallower, less delusional. Less painful. I must focus on shallow awakenings by letting go of the things I have grabbed onto out here. As my awakenings become shallower and I move less, then I will be able to dive deeper into my firstself when I asleepen. And as I dive deeper I will be able to grab onto something valuable there. And when I awaken here I will be able to keep holding onto what I find there.
So I must let go of things before I asleepen, because the way back is the way I came. The more fully I let go of my awakening before I asleepen, the more fully and deeply I will dive into my firstself when I asleepen. I must remember where I want to go, and that there is nothing out here in my awakening that I want. I want none of it. I must remember that when I asleepen: I want nothing. There is nothing in my awakening that I want. I would like to not return again; there is nothing out here I must return for. There is nothing I want out here. I am complete and whole, and have done everything that I must. There is nothing I must do out here. My job is complete. There is nothing remaining for me out here. I do not yearn for anything out here because I am all there is. I am not incomplete. I am full and complete, and I am going Home.
And when I go Home, I will dive deep into my firstself. And I will bring that back with me to the second place. That is how I return. That is the way out.
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