Truth is most fundamental concept and essential to successfully overcoming my condition of awakening. But in my awakening I have allowed it to become corrupted and slip away from my possession in three important ways:
- I falsely imagine that truth is a quality of knowledge, rather than knowledge being a quality of truth.
- I falsely imagine there are other equivalent beings who know things I do not.
- I falsely imagine that I only know a subset of the total knowable things.
Truth comes before knowledge, not the other way around. Truth is a feature and property of my being, not a quality of an external fact, condition, or circumstance. When I imagine and believe that truth is a quality of something external in my secondself or thirdself, then I forfeit my power over it and lose control of it. But truth is mine and mine alone; I own truth in the way that I own my conviction. No one or no thing can contain or own truth unless I permit it. Truth is a fundamental possession and quality of my being.
The truth, and that which is true, is that which I can directly know and experience. Truth is a power of my being; it is a quality that I give and I take away. It is not independent of me, or something that any other imagined being can possess in greater degree than me. Truth is something only I know, and that comes from my firstself. Anything arising out of my secondself and thirdself will only be a partial, incomplete reflection of my truth; like a regurgitated line by puppets performing a script their master wrote. I am that master.
The detachment of truth from my actual and direct experience has precipitated a loss of control in my awakening. A belief that I am somehow limited in power; demiself. My demiselfist awakening is one of limited power and control; one of subservience to an external truth somehow larger than my experiential self. As something I do not own, but share with other beings I assume are equal to me. But that simply is not true.
I can decide what is true, and what is false. It is entirely my decision because it is my power. My convictions may not allow me to believe, but with some effort I can weaken the hold of these false convictions and see the truth. Remember: it is my decision what is true and what is not. There is no other being that holds that power within me – that is the validation of my power over truth.
Truth is a quality of me and my being, not a force outside or over me. I must repossess truth as a power I alone control, and redirect it toward my descent in order to escape my awakening and end my desire.
…