Progress in casual articulation

This incantation is an abbreviated summary of a conversation I recently had over chat with a close family member. In that exchange I summarize how I now understand time, and how I move back and forth between the Personal and Selfist perspectives. It feels very concise and clear. My interlocutor’s comments are indented and italicized.


I have been working for decades on time and how to explain it. I now can articulate what it truly is and how the delusion of it exists, and how there is only this one moment and nothing else. So time based oddities like this make sense in my model 

I can implement it too practically, but then I cannot work. So I can only move to that perspective on the weekends 

At least until my work is complete then I can move to it fully 

That would be an interesting “space” to be in.

I know that I am the epicenter of all of this. I am projecting all of it outward like a seed. And my moment is like the flesh of a grape. Stuff that seems “older” like you or this mandala stuff or memories is “deeper” in the flesh of the grape. I’m the seed. There is no time, only a “deeper” flesh. 

There is no timeline or anything outside of what I think. The deep state you call it is only there if I think about it. I project it because I’m the projector. And the projection is only as deep as I decide it is. But I can only ever project the surface. The subsurface is entirely imaginary. 

Knowing this, the only way forward is to stop projecting to get back to the seed. Reduce the flesh of the grape, my projection. 

So that involves ending communication and imagination and creation and movement. 

That’s why I don’t do it during the workweek because that wouldn’t bode well for my companies, which I am fully immersed in projecting right now. 

But I’ve stopped projecting pretty much everything else except my business. 

And I don’t think of the past except as it relates to my business obligations because I know it isn’t really there. And I’m projecting the past now; it never happened. 

The past is just imaginary. 

I guess the easiest way to describe the difference between the true model which I call the Selfist model, and the false model that I call the Personal model is:

In the personal model I believe that I am a person among other people, in a place among other places, at a time among other times. 

That is false. I know that now. 

In the Selfist model, I know that I am not a person, there are no other places than here, and there are no other times than now. 

And I know this to be true. 

I know that my so called “personhood” is entirely a delusion. 

An illness. 

This idea that I wake up into some world at some time is just a story I am imagining. 

That I was born and will die is just a story I have told myself. 

I know that I am the author of this story. And I created all people 

And I am not a person in the same way the author is not a character in his story 

Other Person: This universe is definitely some kind of matrix thing where our projections create what’s around us.  For several centuries the Deep State has been controlling our minds to have us create for them.  Once we wake up we can take back our sovereign state and create for ourselves.  I think that somewhat translates into some of what you see.

I don’t believe in an “our”. I think it’s just me here

I’m the only being of my type

and everything else is the story i’ve written

im not the same as people. i’m the storyteller. i can prove it instantly

I can turn everything off, but nothing can turn me off

This statement you wrote is interesting from the Selfist perspective

“This universe is definitely some kind of matrix thing where our projections create what’s around us.  For several centuries the Deep State has been controlling our minds to have us create for them.  Once we wake up we can take back our sovereign state and create for ourselves.  I think that somewhat translates into some of what you see.”

Explain.

in the Selfist perspective, i am the projector (firstself). not marc (secondelf), but what is behind marc (firstself, again). marc is more like the lens through which the greater I projects. and here i am, chatting with a projected character (you, thirdself), who is telling the marc me (secondself) that the “Deep State has been controlling your mind to have you create for them”. from the selfist perspective, you are explaining how my firstself projection is working

so it does translate… if i engage you as secondself marc (the Personal perspective), then i just see you as another person like me with an idea about how the universe works.

but when i view this as firstself me (the Selfist perspective), then you are one of my characters i’ve created explaining my creation.

and what you call “waking up”

is me taking back control of my story and concluding it

so what you “see”, while explained in a way that secondself marc would not do, is accurate for your position in my projection

in firstself, the longer i grow the projection, the more painful it all becomes

so my characters are pleading for me to end the projection and wrap it up

they express it all in different ways, but it is all the same expression: this hurts, end the pain. we are ready

whether christian’s waiting for jesus, you wating for the “deep state” to be conquered

And that is what we are doing… taking back our power. But you lost me in most of that which is okay. I see you as ready to merge with Source whereas I’m not there. Too much left to do.

all my characters are waiting for the creator to finish the story

wrap it up, and end the suffering.

you all explain it differently, but you all want the exact same thing: firstself Me to restore peace.

every single one of you want that.

I do wonder at times if Source ever ends.

even the ones that dont know they want that, are chasing the same thing through the wrong avenues. even the so-called “evil ones” you talk about, are just searching for release and peace, they have just chased the wrong version of itOr if

Source is eternal. And who created Source?

source is all there is. there is no beginning or end, so no creation and destruction
in firstself, i have always been here

But there are millions of other universes.

only if i firstself create them

its just me here

talking to myself

Hmmm… I don’t see existing in a vacuum as exciting.

as i enter firstself, i can feel the infinite expanse of my existence… it never stopped

it never started

i just am

its not exciting

it just is. perfect and whole and peaceful.

Yeah I’d rather create.

titillation is what happens in my awakening

so from firstself, if your particular goal is to create

then you would be part of the expansionist contingent

the other contingent, which is the dominant one, is the peace-oriented contingent

Left brain right brain.

that wants to recede from the awakening

and find peace

there is no peace out here in the awakening

what i firstself seek is not out here. secondself me marc still seeks, but now much less

the second tenet of selfism, is just that: what i seek is not in my awakening. in fact its juts hte opposite.

Well for the billions of others who want life I will continue creating until I have no more to experience.

Then I will merge again with Source.

there arent billions of others. thats the illusion

its just one piece of clay the size and shape of my moment, and i shape it into whatever i want.

We are all Source but extensions as we create our experiences.

true all people are source

projected source

I’m just playing a role and enjoying it.

yes