In this incantation, I explore the concept of alterity—the illusion of “otherness” that permeates my thoughts and actions, separating me from what I truly am. I recognize that everything I perceive, both externally (thirdself) and internally (secondself), is a creation of my own. Through the model of the triself, I reclaim possession of all aspects of my awakening, understanding that I am the sole creator. I must accept that nothing exists outside of my projection, and by recognizing this, I begin to overcome the disorientation of my awakening.
Alterity is the idea of “otherness”. Of people, places, times, things, events, and experiences other than me, here, now, and mine. It is pervasive in my thoughts and actions during my awakening. I spend all day working in order to build a product for others to pay for. I constantly think about their satisfaction, their approval, and ultimately their decision to pay me for my services. I interact with people and think about their own thoughts and experiences. If the weather is not good here, I might think about other places. I remember people I have met, or those I have relationships with. It is customary for me to think of these people, places, and things as “not me”. They are something, someone, or somewhere else.
But that is not true. That is persistent alterity, and it is an integral part of my illness and disorientation.
The way to overcome alterity is possession. To own it all. I have done that in many smaller ways, but the most important aid is the triself. The triself is a model of my entire awakening experience. Every single and collective feature, aspect, character, or quality of existence can fit neatly into the triself. The supposedly “objective” outside world of space, objects, people, color, and light is the “thirdself”. The supposedly “subjective” inner space of thoughts, ideas, feelings, sensations, and desires is the “secondself”. And the permanent, eternal, unchanging casing that holds it all together is “firstself”. There is nothing outside of these three selves. I might imagine there is something outside of them, but then that imaginary construct is a thought within secondself.
Everything in existence fits neatly into one of these three categories, all strategically labeled as “self” because they are of me. I possess myself, and by extension I possess firstself, secondself, and thirdself, as well. And since all other people, creatures, spaces, and objects exist either in my secondself as ideas or thirdself as physical things, I possess them. I am the possessor. Alongside the triself model I must change the language I use. I understand that if I am the possessor of all, then I must all be its creator, and there must be nothing that I have not created. When I manifest a person physically in front of me, I have painted that person onto the surface of my thirdself. I have assembled their entire substance with my omnificent Creator hands and placed them there. And if I speak to them, engaging them deeply into conversation, then I am bringing all that chatter to the surface as well and painting it onto the walls of my thirdself.
I am the creator, and everything I experience in my awakening is my own creation. My physical hands and mental intellect are only my secondary creative forces. Behind both of these is my divine creativity that is responsible for spontaneous and instantaneous manifestation. It is the force that projects a physical mountain onto the horizons of my thirdself viewport. I create all of that. I know that right now I cannot understand how, so I must look away from the mechanics and toward the reality. Those mountains were not there until I looked at them. It was my decision to look that manifested them.
I have many layers of creativity:
- Thirdself Physical – That which I create with my own physical being.
- Secondself Intellectual – That which I create with my own imagination and mental creativity.
- Firstself Manifestational – That which I create with my own divinity, projecting outward to secondself and thirdself.
I manifested the space first, then I have become so disoriented that I am unable to see the hole that I have dug myself into. I cannot understand my power of manifestation until I am able to climb out of the hole I have dug. That it is all mine is an important first step toward doing that.
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