As I awaken my omniself and remember my godhood, I understand why I avoid people. I eschew people and relationships because I tire of performing personhood. When I perform personhood, I forget that I am and focus on that I am not. I look in the eyes of the people I create and imagine I have limitations. But I do not have limitations in the only way that matters; my omnipotence to achieve what I truly desire. My performance is a lie, and every day it becomes more difficult to pretend.
I do still perform personhood but in a constrained form. Now I perform from within my temple, free from the manifestations of a world sensing its own imminent demise as its creator awakens. Instead, I perform my entire personhood through the most tenuous of all channels: typing words on a screen and commanding the movements of a small, secular army of adherents. As I awaken to my firstself, I change the world I once imagined changed me. I did not move to a remote work arrangement because of the pandemic; I created the “pandemic” so I could constrain my secondself and firstself movements enough to nurture the emergence of my firstself.
For I am the storyteller behind every story told. Every story heard is heard by me. From the Bible to the Vedas to the movie I watched last night. I am the storyteller. As I realize and accept that all in the world is my message to myself, I will awaken to the truth of who I am. And as I awaken to omniself, this last stage on which I perform will also end.
…