October 8, 2019, Greater Noida

I feel like this description accurately captures what I’ve been trying to say: there is the Observer, and the Person (Marc). Is the Observer “god”? I’m not ready to commit to that, but I think that is the direction.

The Observer is the perspective that precdes the Person — it has been there since my beginning. It is timeless. The Person’s perspective is less than the Observer’s. 

When I think of this, it is easier for me to situate myself in the mode to be able to reflect on it. This is the right dichotomy. This is what I know:

  • It started as the Observer.
  • The Person pulled away from the Observer.
  • The act of “pulling away” is the accumulation of dimensions.
  • Every dimension renders the Person more detached from the Observer.
  • The Observer never stops, but its perspective is distorted by the Person.
  • The Observer is the most real thing there is; in fact, it is all.
  • The Person is stuck in an eddy of dimension — “circumstance” grows out of the Person’s “position” within the dimensions.
  • The Observer precedes the constructs of the Person.
  • All that “exists” is what is right now. If the Person looks, the Person will find. Discovery is just the reflection of the observation itself.
  • All concepts and percepts are motion given meaning.
  • Other persons are “real” insofar as my person has agreed that they are.
  • All meaning is an agreement between these entities.
  • Percepts are things I can touch and see. Concepts are only felt, believed, or otherwise sensed in a non-physical way such as ideas. The two — percepts and concepts — flow together. A single “thing” can exist as both. A concept can be a reference to a percept.

This knowledge can be used. It was hazy before, when I was living in the mountains, but I knew it could be used in some way. I know now that I was idealizing the Observer — associating it, incorrectly, with a certain type of spiritualism. But that association only prevented me from truly experiencing and understanding it. When I first experienced it in my Portland studio on Broadway in 2002, it was magical, but it was none of those things I came to associate it with. It didn’t want anything in particular, or embrace a particular political view or set of values. It was, and is, neutral. It is the Third Way. It isn’t unengaged, but it’s not engaged either. It’s both and nothing. It is. With the right understanding, I can channel the Observer at will, rather than wait for it to appear when certain forces align.

When Marc steps aside for the Observer, calm befalls my existence. But there are some questions I have:

  • What about history? I understand that it is motion given meaning — in this case, it is conceptual because it exists only in the form of thought. It is not something that I can touch or smell — its distance from me is far. They are agreed stories.
  • And what about people before me? Were they really before me, or did Marc just agree to that?
  • Can I change an agreement?
  • Can Marc communicate to all other persons through the Observer?

Who should adopt this perspective?

  • Have you ever wanted to be “taken away”? Perhaps by aliens. Abducted.
  • Do you feel completely isolated from everyone and everything — and you wouldn’t have any problem letting them all go.
  • Do you feel that your personality doesn’t matter?
  • Do you get involved in things deeply only to come to the realization that nothing really matters. Can you say “nothing really matters” and understand that?
  • Do you think that life is, literally, “hell”?
  • Do you think there is something more, something simple just beneath the surface that we aren’t getting?
  • Do you refuse to celebrate other people?
  • Can you leave everything and go away, if there were a way to?
  • Is everything just going to repeat endlessly? Do you believe that if you look, you will find something. But it’s not particularly important to look, or you are tired of the game.
  • Do you want to run away? Do you feel stuck inside of something? Do you want to find the way out? Have you tried before — whether religion or something else? 

The secret isn’t knowing what you don’t know, but knowing that you do know. Marc actually knows everything, and has only agreed that there is other knowledge out there which it doesn’t know. The “unknown” is simply the acknowledgement that there is something more that you do not know.

Everything that ever existed and ever will, is right here right now — it is the sum total of my conceptual and perceptual circumstance. My circumstance, at this moment, is made of the same clay that will make every other circumstance I perceive and conceive. It is all clay being used to build the Person.

The Person is the greatest computer that will ever exist, for it can create and destroy entire worlds of infinite depth with a single thought.

This knowledge will give Marc some qualities in my circumstance. Which qualities?

  • See people for what they are: growths on the Observer. Distortions of the Observer’s one perspective.
  • See life what what it is: the experience of moving away and then back to the Observer.
  • Marc is small and insignificant because that is what he believes.

When the Observer enters, your eyes will stretch wide.

Learning is the acquisition of new dimensions that will only further separate a person from the Observer. That is why the most learned are the most secular, the least spiritual.