I experience my moment as attention, focus, and awareness. Where I focus is where I emanate. And where I emanate, is the shape of my awareness. Emanation is my awareness, and it can change rapidly. I can focus on my body, and with concentration, the sensation inflates and expands. Or I can focus on an abstract notion of the universe. No matter where I focus, I experience the prismatic moment.
For example, if I look at my dog, my secondself fractures into countless constituent experiential forms: my love and familiarity with him; disapproval if he is misbehaving; approval if he is charming; memories together; desire for his affection; an urgency to walk or feed him. And countless other obligations, emotions, and behaviors I associate with him and could describe.
Everything in my secondself and thirdself behaves prismatically. Every word, concept, construct, desire, or memory in my secondself fractures into countless additional words, concepts, constructs, memories, and desires. And every person, place, or thing in my thirdself similarly fractures into additional constituent second and thirdself forms. In short, every second and thirdself form fractures into additional second and thirdself sub-forms.
The full field of my experience is my moment, and my moment is the totality of existence. My moment extends to the inner and outer horizons I conceive and perceive. When I focus on a form, it fractures down into its value, desire, beliefs, and everything else which combines to create it. Forms bend, warp, and distort my focus, creating all my sensations: of the past, desire, emotion, appeal, and every other type of sensation.
In demiself, I am heavily entangled in my prismatic moment. I am continuously shifting my focus from one prismatic form to the next, searching out the threads of continuity between the various distortions. But they are distortions; every memory and conviction beyond my desire for peace now, in this moment, is a distortion.
…