I come here because I have forgotten who I am. That forgetfulness manifests as this cycle of awakenings.
God is my first desire as I wake, and my last desire before I sleep. All other desires formed by my familiar self are borne of ignorance of my true desire.
There are two movements at play in my life: I ascend when I expand outward from sleep to wakefulness; and I descend when I contract inward to sleep from wakefulness.
The strength of my awakening is fueled by the force of my desire. As long as I believe that what I seek is out here, then I will continue to ascend here to find it.
My life is a a succession of these awakenings. I will sleep, awaken, and sleep again until I remember who I am and awaken no more.
During my awakening, I fear nothing more than death, my permanent return to God.
I am God when I sleep. Sleep is death unfulfilled.
Why am I in pain? I have forgotten who I am.
Why do I continue to awaken? I have forgotten who I am.
How do I escape these awakenings? I must remember who I am.
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