In this incantation, I acknowledge that my identity and desires are inseparable, both emerging from the same moment of my awakening. My personhood exists only in relation to what is in front of me, shaped by my desires. As I awaken, I recognize that desire defines who I am, and understanding this desire is the key to escaping my awakenings.
My identity and my desire are one and the same. Both begin at the same point and exist only in my moment. My identity as a person is a belief that I sustain during my awakening. My personhood is my reaction to what I see in front of me: I am here, and here is full of people, and therefore I am a person. It exists only in the context of what is in front of me right now, in the midst of my own awareness, my own awakening. Everything I desire is also something before me, whether physically present or just ahead, waiting for me in time.
My identity as a person and my desires are one and the same. They are inseparable. It’s not that I first become a person and then, separately, form desires. I believe I am a person, and therefore I desire what a person desires. But it goes deeper than that. In each moment, who I believe I am is shaped by what I want, and what I want is shaped by who I believe I am.
My identity is my desire, and my desire is my identity. If I do not desire, then I will not awaken. And if I do not awaken, then I will not assume the identity of personhood. My awakening, my moment, my personhood, and my desire are all one and the same thing. They are each different words explaining the exact same thing: the disease of my condition. My awakening into this confusing and painful maze I call life. Desire alone is the way out; I must understand and conquer my desire.
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