There are a few people in my life who feel threatened by my decisions and ideology. They try to constrain and diminish me, often by using my past comments, actions, and behaviors against me. Their interpretations are either misunderstandings or willful misrepresentations and do not represent me.
It is tempting to engage these people to persuade them that I am or am not one way or another. That I am not “just pessimistic”. Or that I am not mentally unhealthy. Or dissatisfied with some disappointments or shortcomings I may have had in the second place.
But as long as I seek their approval, they will have the capacity to withhold it. I was only able to escape these relationships with time away and solitude. Over time, with less interaction, I thought less about them and my desire for their approval receded.
I directly and unashamedly told them exactly who I was, without any concern for a response. In my case, it was my proclamation: this is who I am and this is what I know. Eventually, I stopped sharing altogether, and we lost touch.
These are the gatekeepers who try to keep me where they think I was, where they are, or where they want me to be. I have never found people who have this tendency and who are willing to let go of it, so I have always had to be let go of them.
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