Though I hadn’t always described it as such, my mission for many years has been to constrain my secondself and thirdself to my moment.
I once spent my moment lost in imaginary future moments. I would spend hours contemplating my future fortunes and experiences. It was titillating, because in those fantasies I was an accomplished and creative hero. And just as I stretched outward into the furthest reaches of my secondself and dwelled there, I constantly sought thirdself circumstances beyond those I enjoyed. I was dissatisfied with the possessions and experiences of my actual thirdself.
I do not do that anymore. My secondself is largely constrained to my moment. There are certainly times when I expand outward, especially while working, but I fixate primarily on my present moment. And similarly, I spend the vast majority of my awakening constrained to my cell; a small, dark space just large enough for me to sit down, write, and pray in peace.
I move as little as possible so I can constrain my secondself and thirdself. I do not think about things, people, places, or experiences which are not present in my moment. In this way, I can more clearly experience my firstself.
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