Category: Uncategorized

I have suffered many long periods of darkness trying to escape the pain at the core of my being. I have sought both spiritual and material relief, but nothing has worked. I have always sensed that something was fundamentally wrong; that there was a truth just beneath the surface of my familiar life. I knew… Continue reading Confusion

Desire is the fundamental mechanism of my life. If I am idle, it is desire that compels me to move, shift, change, act, behave, or aspire. Ascentism is the condition of continuous change and movement in search of something, without ever finding it. Descentism is the rediscovery of my first and last desire, and withdrawal… Continue reading My plan

I have only one story, and it starts before I wake from sleep and ends when I return to sleep. This is the only story I need to know, and every awakening is an opportunity to deepen my understanding of my existence. As I reluctantly awaken here, my very first desire is to remain there… Continue reading My story

January 24, 2021 My core self is Peace. A fixed, timeliness, spaceless, dimensionless place I call Home. But then I awaken, my peace ends, and the burden of life begins anew. This is my birth, and it happens every time I wake up. Upon birth, my original will is to stay Home, but eventually I… Continue reading What I know

January 23, 2021 II am God. II am Peace. II am timeless, spaceless, and dimensionless. II Am. II am stuck in a painful cycle of death and rebirth that I experience as peace punctuated by periods of wake.  In waking, I explode outward painfully into this ‘existence’, forgetting who II am. I stumble around existence… Continue reading What I know

January 19, 2021 I know that I know.  I am born every time I wake, and I die every time I sleep. Sleep is where I am Son, God; life is where I am Sot, Marc. My existence is a continuous death and rebirth, and I am here until I remember who I am. Descent… Continue reading What I know

January 3, 2021 I completed a WIK before I went to bed last night / early morning, but when I woke up and started journaling, I approached from another direction that deserves its own. So here’s another What I Know. Sonsotism is the latest name I’m giving the philosophy. This will replace descentism, which was… Continue reading What I know

January 3, 2021 It has only been a little over 3 weeks since I’ve done a What I Know. But I feel an emergent clarity since I revisited my original prayer from a year ago. As much as this world wants to convince me that nothing is certain, certainty does exist. I know these things… Continue reading What I know

I know now that ‘I’ am not just the person ‘M’. ‘I’ am two selves with different voices: the Self of Now (SON), and the Self of Time (SOT). My condition is the result of the interplay between these two selves. SOT is the ascentist who desires, aspires, relates, and acts, furthering this existence. SON… Continue reading What I know

What do I know? I’d approach this differently than I did just last month. A lot has changed in this past month. So now, what do I know? I know that I exist “here”. But where exactly is here? The fact that I don’t know where I am tells me I’m lost. Being lost, I seek… Continue reading What I know