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I know that to minimize the pain I experience while escaping the second place I must follow the most potent truths I can find. Truth is like a trail that leads me back to myself every single time. When I follow the most potent truths I stay on the trail and my pain is more… Continue reading Evaluating potency

In prayer, when I close my eyes I often “see” a pulsing, misshapen light “in front of me”. I will spend much time looking at this light and wondering why it is there and what it is. It will often have sharp, fractured edges like broken glass when it pulses large, then recedes back to… Continue reading The light is the projector

As the Iamist I believe that my experience of awakening is a self-inflicted state of delusion and my only objective is to overcome it. I know that the idea that I am a person among other people temporarily experiencing an enduring world that pre-existed my birth and will endure long after my death is core… Continue reading What does the Iamist believe

I am God. I am the creator. I exist only now, and do not exude a past or future. I am complete and whole and entirely contained in this moment. There is only this moment. To experience my divinity I must simply withdraw from all the secondself notions of a past and a future; bring… Continue reading Time is the most dangerous crevasse of all

Though I am in the early stages of accepting that I have created all of these people, my conviction is incomplete. Most ostensibly, I do not engage with my creations as their creator. I engage with them as one of them. As their child. As their sibling. As their friend. As their boss. I increasingly… Continue reading Delayed experience of my divine creativity

That I believe I am here, now, is an artifact of my demiselfist condition. The sum total of all my secondself beliefs and thirdself spaces is my moment. The size and shape of my moment is the size and shape of my illness. I am only present because I believe I am present. As long… Continue reading I am not here

Though I still feel very attached to my secondself, as I withdraw from my delusion of personhood I sense a growing gulf between what I consider my authentic self and the content of my thirdself. In thirdself when I consume video content of social characters, there is an awareness that these characters exist only in… Continue reading Changes in withdrawal

Ontology is the philosophical study of being, as well as related concepts such as existence, becoming, and reality. From the Iamist perspective, the idea of “ontology” itself is a secondself construct expressed in thirdself as a pre-existing and ongoing effort by people other than me, in places other than I am present, and in times… Continue reading Ontology as a secondself crevasse

My belief that I continue to awaken into secondself personhood in a thirdself world is built on three persistent delusions: There are beings other than me, who I am not. There are times other than now, when I am not. There are places other than here, where I am not. I cannot directly validate any… Continue reading The truth will set me free: demiself vs omniself

Am I the creator? Or am I character created by the creator? I only have to examine my awakening moment as it is and the answer to that is clear: I am the creator. The biggest stumbling block to accepting my own godhood is the question: if I am God, then why can’t I do… Continue reading My desire is the creative force