Category: Uncategorized

In this incantation, I realize that the essence of my being resides in what I perceive when I close my eyes—the peaceful, unchanging core that is always with me. Despite the fleeting pain and distractions of the external world, I awaken to the truth that I am not the performances or goals that pull me… Continue reading I am what I am when I close my eyes

In this incantation, I explore a new approach to explaining the nature of my existence as a sequence of components nested inside of one another. I unravel the existential layers of my being, seeing clearly how my desire fractures my true self and distorts my awareness. I identify desire as the core of my secondself,… Continue reading My existential stack

In this incantation I even further simplify the truth of who and what I am. I have eliminated virtually all abstractions, and have realized my goal of simplifying the truth to something I can directly and immediately validate myself. Now, I only have to believe it and follow it where it takes me. I confront… Continue reading What I am

Everything in my awakening is a probe. The people are all probes… probing me for my next move and informing the illness. The illness is a single-minded organism, collecting information from me through all its various agents that manifest as individual people. They share their information with the collective, anticipating my next move and shapeshifting… Continue reading The probes

In this incantation, I realize that my resistance to truth in others stems from the fact that I am both the creator and observer. Since I created the characters and their insights, there is no need to feel envious or threatened by their truths—they are all my own creation. I habitually dismiss anything I see… Continue reading Do not envy the thirdself creators

In this incantation, I describe a profound vision, triggered by the simple act of looking up while in darkness. Through this inner experience, I encounter an angelic presence and a vast, peaceful expanse, revealing that what I seek lies above me, in a higher realm beyond my current state. This reflection solidifies the realization that… Continue reading Look up

In this incantation I describe my latest conceptualization of my anatomy as a being. I answer the question, more precisely than ever, “What am I?”. I explore the complex relationship between my awakening, projection, and asleepening states, seeking to unify them into a single narrative. I describe my projection as the process of manifesting my… Continue reading Projection, injection, and prejection

In this incantation I document a secondself inconsistency in the way I think about the space of my awakening, and how I must rectify it with a different interpretation. I recognize that by closing a curtain, I do not shut out an external world, but rather un-create or demanifest it. I realize that the outside world… Continue reading Projection alignment

In this incantation I continue my effort to resolve my understanding of my moment. Specifically, I introduce a new way to refer to “past events” that does not perpetuate the false construct that there is an actual moment that is not now. I realize that my memories, beliefs, and desires are not remnants of the past… Continue reading I am closer to defining my moment…

In this incantation, I realize that my beliefs and memories are not reflections of a true past but parasitic manifestations I actively maintain in the present. My secondself and thirdself are distortions of my perfect, infinite being, torn apart by my illness. My memories, like layers of clothing, are worn to keep me trapped in… Continue reading The parasitism of my beliefs