In prayer, when I close my eyes I often “see” a pulsing, misshapen light “in front of me”. I will spend much time looking at this light and wondering why it is there and what it is. It will often have sharp, fractured edges like broken glass when it pulses large, then recedes back to a small point of light.
This light is the projector. It is Firstself as experienced from Secondself. The key is in realizing that the light is not the entirety of what I am looking at; the momentary oscillating lightshow is only the tip. The darkness behind and all around it, my Secondself and Thirdself, is its true girth and scope. It is infinite.
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