In this incantation, I recognize that my longing for what is not here keeps me in motion, preventing my escape. The stories of lack I tell myself create distance—forward to desire, backward to regret. If I remove these distances, I reach stillness, where escape becomes possible. Otherwise, I risk being caught in an endless cycle of seeking, forever swirling in a relief eddy.
There is something correct about the forward and backward distance. The examination of my memories — the stories I tell myself of not having enough or wanting more. Those are the stories I need to correct. And in doing so, enough will come.
To escape I must eliminate the backward distance to my memories and the forward distance to my desires. This will effectively terminate all my movement and allow me to focus on my escape.
It is the distance: wanting something I do not presently have. That is the source of all my movement. Wanting a place that is not here. Wanting a thing I do not possess. Wanting an experience I have not had. Wanting an achievement I have not accomplished. Wanting a feeling I do not have. Wanting a mental or emotional adjustment over what I think or feel right now.
My escape is entirely dependent on identifying every one of those desires — small and large — that suggests that what I seek is somewhere other than here, sometime other than now, and something other than what I have and am. If I find myself looking forward spatially for something I do not have, or backward temporarily for something I do not have, I am in danger of creating and getting trapped in another circuitous eddy.
The relief eddy.
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